The Breathing Prosperity blog

“We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.”~ Jim Rohn

Patience is a virtue, my mother always told me…and I’ll bet your mother (or someone else close to you) may have told you the same thing.

But is it really?

The Good

Patience can serve us in many circumstances, both personal and professional. When we are likely to jump to erroneous conclusions, for instance, or when we react in a panic and almost do something against our own good…these are times when patience is a virtue. A prior commitment to - and practice in - patience allows us to calm down, assess a situation and react with calmness and dignity. It prevents us from ruining relationships and from making rash decisions we might later regret.

The Bad

However, what about situations where we are waiting for something good to happen, where instead of creating what we want in life, we sit back and hope they will happen the way we envision? What if ‘all good things’ don’t come to those who wait? What if, instead, the only thing that comes to those who wait is regrets at the end of life?

The Ugly

I have come to believe that ‘All good things come to those who wait’ isn’t necessarily true.

With respect to meeting life’s hopes and goals, this is definitely mis-guidance. (Sure, that’s not a word, but it works!) As anyone who has lost someone close to them or perhaps experienced a life-threatening illness or incident truly knows, LIFE IS SHORT. 

It is extremely easy to get complacent, and also to save our dreams for ’someday.’ For many sad and regretful people, someday comes when they are nearing the end of life and wondering how all that time slipped by so quickly. Someday comes and the realization of so many lost and forgotten dreams hits like a blow to the heart and soul…and the sense or urgency that should have been present all along becomes painfully apparent. We have all heard the adage about how much better it is to look back and be proud of everything we’ve done and tried, rather than to look back and wish we had done and tried things…yet many of us do not take this into account in our everyday lives. Even now, for instance, as I look back on my twenties I think to myself that if I had only known and practised then what I do now, I’d be much farther ahead financially by now.

The pain of discipline Jim Rohn speaks about is that of making the effort to do the little things every day which ensure our dreams are met, and do not instead fall by the wayside. The weight of regret truly  is far heavier.

The question then becomes, What will the future me look back and say to the woman I am today?…

I can see this because I am asking clearly: She will wish I was more consistent with my fitness, more proactive with my goals, and even more appreciative of loved ones. She will remind me to be kind to myself, while at the same time asking more from myself on a daily basis. 

The Beautiful

When we open our minds and perspective in this way, we can see opportunities and storylines to which we are now blind. We view our lives from a higher and wider place, and admit that someday is not only now, but is also coming sooner than we think. We bring our actions and our goals into alignment, and in doing so we enrich our current lives and our future days beyond measure.

Life can be a beautiful balance between being patient with ourselves and being impatient with our intentions, between passionately and actively pursuing our dreams and having the humility to allow the Universe to show us the way.

Many times when we are striving to create ‘better’ lives, we forget that we already have it all.

We are not separate from the magic and wonder and abundance of the Universe - we are just disconnected from it in certain facets of our lives. We compartmentalize ourselves, and in so doing we cut ourselves off from the flow and magic of life. It’s not that the Universe is not delivering - it’s that we are not noticing and receiving!

There was a time when hearing this would have annoyed me…I would NOT acknowledge or believe that I was the one pinching off my goodness. Having grown and expanded since then (with so much more to go!), I now see the inarguable truth in this - we are each letting in only so much, and our outer lives correspond exactly to the flow we are allowing.

Example:

The other night, my honey and I were out watching planes; an activity we enjoy as we are both pilots and watching jets come and go lets us feel the magic of traveling. At any rate, we were out walking in the industrial area which surrounds our international airport, and expressing immense gratitude for the fact that we did not have to work in any of the cubicles in the dusty old buildings or in the warehouses we were passing…we are so grateful for the life we’ve worked to create, and with our expression of gratitude we invite more wonder, happiness and joy.

At one point, the sun was setting, just slipping below the clouds. We stopped mid-walk to watch it, marveling at how quickly it sinks and being reminded at how fast time passes. Right there, we re-vowed to try and enjoy each moment. As we were standing there on the sidewalk, the last working stragglers from the day were getting in their cars and trucks from various offices and warehouses; some of them looked at us as if to say ‘What are YOU lookin’ at?’ What we were looking at  was this spectacular sunset right behind them; you would think that seeing us both looking up into the sky with grateful smiles on our faces would at least prompt them to turn around and see for themselves…but no! Not one person did this! They all walked to their cars in various stages of grumpiness and resignedness (I’m making assumptions but a) I’ve been there and b) it was fairly obvious), missing the glory and beauty right above their heads. It’s choking me up just writing this, how human beings can miss such exquisiteness by being trapped in their own heads, dealing instead with spiralling thoughts about how hopeless things are, or even more mundane, thoughts about what’s for dinner.

The bottom line is, there is abundance, wonder and magic ALL AROUND US, from the tiniest wave of energy to the most complex functions of human bodies, the cosmos and our beautiful spinning planet which supports us all in myriad ways.

P.S. If you want a reminder, try some of the following resources:

• The Case for a Creator
• What the Bleep do We Know?
• Conversations With God
• The Intention Experiment
• Wayne Dyer’s Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling

Photo credit: ccjones
 

Here is a question for you: Do you think that being a ‘good’ person somehow precludes financial abundance?

While your immediate answer may be no, I invite you to explore the question in a round-about way by considering how you feel about others and the prosperity they may attract:

• Think about someone who is well-known for charitable acts and human kindness, such as Mother Theresa or perhaps the Dalai Lama. They live or lived lives of simplicity, eschewing luxurious possessions and preferring instead to dedicate their time to communion with God and helping their fellow human beings.
• Consider people who spread messages of abundance and unity, such as Deepak Chopra, Wayne Dyer and Gary Zukav. These gentlemen all believe in our spiritual connection to each other and to our higher source, and devote their time to sharing this with the world, in the hopes of making it a better, more peaceful place for each of us.
• Look at industry leaders who are scions of wealth such as Bill Gates, Ted Rogers and others. Whether or not they contribute to charitable causes, they enjoy extreme abundance financially, and can physically have anything they desire.

Now, as you read through that short list, do you have any judgements about who is or is not a ‘good’ person? Would it be OK if Mother Theresa lived in a mansion and drove around in a $200,000 car? What about Deepak Chopra or Wayne Dyer? Do you feel that they should all enjoy (and deserve) abundance, or that somehow any money they receive should be given away toward the ‘greater good?’ Where did these thoughts come from, and are they really valid?

Somehow many of us have it in our heads that we can either live a monk-like existence, devoting our lives to others or to God or to contemplating spiritual truths…OR we can live lives rich with financial abundance and enjoy all the physical luxuries available. Why, I ask, do we perpetuate the belief that goodness, or spirituality, and massive, magnificent wealth are mutually exclusive? Why do we think that keeping it is selfish and spiritually bankrupt?…

Not everyone thinks this way, of course, but if this strikes a chord within you, then it may be worth exploring further. By examining the thoughts and beliefs which bubble up when looking at the lives and actions of others, we can see more clearly what conflicts may exist between our own intentions and the inner beliefs we hold.

For instance, if we feel we are basically good people, and we are trying to create massive abundance for ourselves, is it possible we are holding ourselves back - albeit unconsciously - because we feel any money we attract should not be kept? Maybe we have a desire for a fantastic sports car, and all the while we think we are sending out the vibration of loving the car, yet we are undermining it with a deep-seated and hidden belief that it is somehow rude, pretentious or even downright wrong to ’show off’ our money or possessions.

As usual, this is just food for thought. The conflicting beliefs which limit us are often hidden - even from us - maybe especially from us! It’s often easier to see what someone else’s beliefs are by the results they are creating in their lives than to notice your own. Have you ever even asked yourself ‘What are the results I have in my life at the moment, and what do my circumstances say about my beliefs?’ It’s a great question, and you can ask it any time to get a reading on how you’re doing, vs. how you’d like to be doing. Honesty is always the fastest track to change.

Here are great book suggestions to explore this question further in your own life:

Why You’re Dumb, Sick & Broke, and How to Get Smart, Healthy & Rich by Randy Gage

Zero Limits: The Secret Hawaiian System for Wealth, Health, Peace and More by Joe Vitale and Ihaleakala Hew, Ph.D Len

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker

…And, for further help with aligning your thoughts, try these:

Quantum Creations with James Arthur Ray

Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki

Some other ideas to help you align your thoughts with the abundance you desire include creating affirmations for yourself which you repeat daily until the ybecome a prt of you, and keeping pictures of things and experiences you would love to have in places where you can see them - where they will ’sink in’ and become a part of what your mind accepts is possible - for you!

You are a wonderful, good person and you deserve to experience massive abundance!

Part of growing up and standing on one’s own two feet lies in feeling a sense of responsibility; for one’s choices, circumstances, and life in general. Pulling up the bootstraps and saying ‘OK, no matter what has gone before, my life’s results are up to me,’ is just part of being a fully functioning adult.

Moving further along and discovering the personal development path, many take the concept of self-resonsibility even deeper. We learn that our thoughts, beliefs and attitudes create our circumstances, and we begin to explore the ways in which we actually affect the world around us. Learning, acknowledging and even changing the way we affect things and people around us is an important step, but the question for today is: is it possible to feel TOO much responsibility?

As food for thought, I offer a personal example which brought me to this question (and my own answer) today while I was contemplating it. My parents, who love each other very much, were fighting…it wasn’t an all-out fight but a war of no words and cold shoulders, and it made me extremely uncomfortable. After talking with both of them and wishing them luck, I was left wondering why a rift between two other people would leave me feeling so uncomfortable and sad. I often find myself deeply affected by conflict, and I am definitely in the habit of trying to ’solve’ things for people when I see they are unhappy or not getting along. As I think back, I see that this has been a pattern in my life…whenever there is conflict, whether I personally am in the middle of it or not, I feel uncomfortable and I try and ‘make it better.’

As I have grown, I have developed the habit of asking myself how I have contributed to any conflict I am involved in; what have I been doing that has caused this, or attracted it to me?  This sense of responsibility has moved me far into the life of my dreams, as it enabled me to sit in the driver’s seat of my own life. I think it is generally a good trait, and I have been proud of myself and frustrated when others lack it.

Getting back to the question…for some reason I made a new decision today to leave my parents to their tiff and just ‘never mind.’ It’s their business, I thought, and they are adults making their own choices. BINGO! Those two phrases hit me like lightning, with the realization that I had not been giving people - or myself - these two acknowledgements. Follow me through this point, because it’s really important and I felt a huge sense of growth and freedom when I internalized this insight today:

1) It’s their business:  What a relief! I somehow feel responsible even when people I care about are experiencing conflict. I have spent a lot of time learning that what other people think of me is none of my business, but somehow never applied the lesson the other side of the coin. It’s not that I’m butting in to others’ lives when I try to soothe feelings, but at the same time, I feel a remarkable sense of giddiness in realizing it’s really none of my business.

2) They are adults and they’re making their own choices: This is a bit of an expansion on point number one. My feelings of discomfort have come from judging situations as wrong: I had never thought of this before. In being so concerned, I was almost babying my parents and not allowing them to make their own choices. They want to fight? Let them fight! It’s OK. Again, I feel a great sense of relief.

This is a valuable insight for me, and will affect my life in profound ways. Some of you may already know this, but for those who don’t, I hope my sharing will provoke a little introspection. It’s been quite liberating, and anyone who wants to create and follow their own path in life definitely needs to feel liberated!