The Breathing Prosperity blog

I just read this lovely saying in my fave magazine (Elite Traveler) and it seems to sum up the way i feel about things…it certainly made me grin from ear to ear, and I want to share it with you:

“Be daring, be different, be impractical;
be anything that will assert integrity
of purpose and imaginative vision against
the play-it-safers,the creatures of the
commonplace, the slaves of the ordinary.”

Want to be happy? Wealthy? Satisfied? The answer is as simple as they come…..be yourself. There is no one like you in the entire universe, and if you deny - or don’t even know - yourself, you deny the rest of us of the gift of seeing you shine and enjoying your unique presence. The most beautiful gift you can give to yourself and others is to be the most authentic YOU you can be. As someone wise once said, you can try all your life to be like other people, but what you should be trying to do is be more of yourself. No one can do it for you, and no one can do it LIKE you!

When we talk about the Law of Attraction, we tend to use a lot of definitions as to how things ’should’ be in order to make the best use of natural principles. For example, although we assert that nothing is either good or bad, we do say that we must keep our energy levels and thought vibrations high so that we may attract like thoughts and vibrations. Similarly, we say that we must focus on what we want, rather than what we don’t want, so that we may attract more of that which we are focused on (because what we focus on is what expands in our lives).

With all this attention on maintaining states and thought patterns that serve us and help us achieve our goals, we must also remember to allow things to flow with their natural rythms.

It is actually possible to be so rigid in our thoughts or attempts to maintain a positive state that we stop the flow of energy, thereby keeping from us that which we are trying to attract. For instance, if we are constantly monitoring our emotions so that we ‘purge’ anything negative, we may be blocking the natural flow of an emotion that needs to be processed, such as when we are naturally saddened by the death of a loved one. In a similar way, if we hold grudges against others then no matter how much work we do on ourselves in other areas, the resentment constitutes an energy block - or wall - that we have installed and which will impede the flow of all things good to the extent that it exists. These are sometimes called blind spots, and can be readily identified by noticing when you feel uptight, or when you frequently experience the same emotion or thought pattern. Your pet peeves, for example, are good clues as to your emotional blocks, and if explored and released can leave room for bursts of new growth, thus paving a new pathway for wonderful things to happen, where previously there was only a dead-end. As with everything else about Law of Attraction and personal development, the answers are inside you. Go explore!

Have you ever noticed that whenever you want to learn something new, you are faced with a million experts who want to tell you ‘THE WAY’?…

I am learning about the stock market, and have spent many hours in the past couple of months studying various books and courses, from books about trading and investing to courses covering economic and financial basics. As I go, I notice that although my comfort with financial and market concepts grows ever stronger, the information I am reading is more and more conflicting. As my knowledge grows I can see the contradictions in what people teach, moreso than I could when I had just started and was only trying to grasp terminology. In every book or course someone who says ‘If you follow my way you will make money. If you don’t then good luck while you crash and burn!’…but how can they all be true if they are completely conflicting?…

I found this all a little confusing until I remembered that in ANY industry or subject, we find the same phenomenon. Whether you are studying Law of Attraction, health and fitness, or almost any other ‘How To’ subject, there will be conflicting opinions from ‘experts.’ The fact is that there are many ways to make something ‘work’, and I think this is reflected in the many different strategies you will find to accomplish a given objective. Each person can only speak from their own expererience and perspective, and the more you learn, the more you can apply to your own life and create your own unique strategy using what works for you. Of course we need to learn from the trials and errors of others so that we can shorten our own learning curve, but we are all different in our likes and dislikes, schedules and tolerances, etc….thus, what will work best for us is usually a combination of techniques as unique as we are. In fact, I would go so far as to say that if we follow someone else’s strategy blindly, we may actually fare worse than if we experiment and try and find a combination that works best for us. Because we are unique, what worked wonders for someone else may not be best for us at all. Do not lose sight of the truth that whatever strategy you choose in any endeavour, it is the back-up traits that you bring to the game that will help you win - traits such as commitment, consistency, integrity, desire for growth and learning, and ability to visualize the end result - NOT the strategy itself. With this in mind, choose your strategy/ies, commit yourself, and change as you feel the need to make adjusmtents. As Brian Tracy says, you cannot adjust the direction of the arrow until you launch it!

Are your thought vibrations in harmony with that which you want?

One of the major principles of Law of Attraction is that everything - EVERYTHING - is vibration; that each individual existence, from human beings and rocks, to sound and light, to thoughts, exist in their true nature as frequencies…also known as vibrations. 

Like a tuning fork, a vibration of any sort will seek out and ‘pick up’ other alike vibrations. To follow this theory to its practical end and yet keep it short here, suffice to say that when we think AS IF we already are and have what it is we say we want, then we will naturally - and inevitably - attract it. By thinking about what we want rather than what we don’t want, we align oursleves - literally, vibrationally - with that which we want: The Law of Attraction in action.

Today I picked up an Abraham Hicks* book (I like to let books ‘fall open’ and see where I end up, just to discover if the message might have some particular meaning in that moment) and a phrase jumped out at me. There was a question and answer section, with common thoughts or beliefs and the answers/suggestions from Abraham Hicks as to how we might improve on them in order to align ourselves with that which we want. Most of them are old hat for me as I have been studying this subject for a long time, but one of my beliefs was on the page loud and clear and I have never realized how misaligned it is with what I truly want. The belief, and I am paraphrasing, was something like ‘There are so many wonderful places to go and see in the world and I want to be able to see all of them. I am missing out by not traveling enough and not having more wealth to enjoy the freedom I deserve and desire…I want to be elsewhere.‘ I read that basically what I am saying subconsciously is that: where I am is not good enough, I am separate from that which I want, there is something ‘wrong’ with my current situtation…just to name a few limiting and misaligned beliefs that became apparent. Wow!

Any form of longing is lack-based and prohibits the very thing you want from coming to you. I can improve my mindset and my ability to create what I want by better aligning myself vibrationally, ie. via my thoughts. I can think such productive thoughts as: I travel often and I LOVE seeing all the exotic and beautiful places of the world. I love that there are so many places to see and do, and I am so lucky that I will have the opportunity to explore and see all of the places on my list. Today’s technology is so fantastic and I can book online and go last-minute to almost anywhere. How exciting! I’m so grateful to be living the life of my dreams.

Now, the fact is I already DO travel quite a lot and I’m already living the (evolving) life of my dreams, but in this particular case I was NOT correctly aligned. I was pining for the places I have not yet had the chance to see, and for even more freedom and money so that I can ‘get started’…what an eye-opener that was. I am sharing this in hopes that you, too, may discover some ways in which you have been limiting yourself without even realizing it…because then you can CHANGE your mind, and thus change your life!

(*You may remember Esther Hicks from her interview on The Secret…now availabe in book form!)

As usual, it is in practice rather than in theory that we find out if our beliefs and choices serve us.

I have been so deeply sad in the past couple of days about Jordan (about whom I wrote yesterday) that I haven’t really cared about much except perhaps being grateful for my own little girl. I know very well that this stagnant state of mind is neither healthy nor helpful, but I also know from my bereavement training that people need to have a little space and time to assimilate something - myself included.

However, as we know many people die in many tragic ways all over the world every day. One of the very fundamental principles of what we teach - as you will hear everywhere from our courses to The Secret - is that you create and experience what you think about. Thus, sadness begets sadness. We can ALWAYS find something to be sad or upset about, even if it isn’t an immediate tragic event.

So, this morning as I was driving along and trying to shake myself out of it, it occurred to me that maybe we feel guilty being happy when we know things aren’t ‘right’. It all comes down to the same thing in a way…do you not have wealth because inside you are concerned that people won’t like you? Do you hold your tongue when you are angry out of respect, or is it because you are afraid of the repercussions of speaking your mind? Do you feel wrong being happy when someone you know is sick, or hurting? The underlying belief in all of this is really important because it keeps us from creating and experiencing the lives of our dreams…it says that what others think is more important than our own happiness. That we must curtail ourselves, hold ourselves back and act in certain ‘acceptable ‘ways. How can we just go around being HAPPY???

Well…if you say you want happiness, then how can you achieve it if you don’t choose it?…not just when it is easy and everything is going swimmingly, but always…because it is your choice, and it is your life.

Of course there is a time for sadness and for anger, but if we hang on to it it hurts only us, both as we hang on to it and by the results we create with it…you are what you think about. I can grieve with my friends and be happy in my own life all at the same time. I must keep my perspective balanced and hold all of it - happy and sad - in my mind at one time. 

I have already decided (=intent) that when faced with adversity, I will choose to bounce back and carry on with my life, being focused on my goals (=flexibility), so now I need only to rely on that prior decision to help me regain my perspective. This is what we mean when we say decide what you want to be, and then BE THAT. I choose peace, and from that place I can best help myself and my friends.

This weekend, dear friends of ours lost their little girl, Jordan. Of all things, she choked on a grape, and died in her father’s arms despite their frantic efforts to save her. She was only 3 years old, and I write this as just a small tribute to the sweet young girl that she was. Jordan was a delightful child, and touched the lives of everyone who knew her. Her parents are exceptional people and created a little girl with a unique mix of her father’s quiet intelligence and her mother’s fiery, brilliant feistiness. It is so very difficult to watch them suffer through this loss. In fact, it causes me to question my deepest beliefs…for how can Law of Attraction apply here? How can they have thought this into happening?…They are expecting another baby and are probably the best and most loving parents I have known. The truth is we cannot know everything and there are forces at play that we just do not understand…all I can do is be there for my friends in the days and months to come. I apologize for the sadness of today’s post, but felt it necessary to say goodbye and thank you to little Jordan for being with us these past short years…we love you and we will deeply miss your little ways.

Most people don’t know what they see anymore because they’ve stopped looking; they brush their teeth, fix their makeup, maybe notice a pimple or two, baggy eyes…but never stopping long enough to realize that the person they keep looking at every day is changing, has changed, is continuing to change.

REMIND ME TO SEE MYSELF THE WAY YOU SEE ME - Imagine me loving what I see when the mirror looks at me ’cause I imagine in a place with no insecurities and I’m finally happy because I imagine me. I admit it was hard for me to see that you could be in love with someone like me. Letting go of my past and glad that I have another chance because finally I can imagine me.

Those are the words of Kirk Franklin’s song Imagine Me. Lately I’ve felt really lost and the image that people saw of me was not one that I saw of myself. I would get simple compliments and think that these people were crazy. For example I really hated my legs - I think they are horrible from some illness I had as a child - but lately I’ve had 5 men mention how great my legs were - Yikes!!! What were they seeing that I couldn’t because all I saw was a miserable human being with horrible legs?…We go through life with this image of ourselves that may have nothing to do with reality, that may not even be the person we now are. Maybe we are looking back at our former selves, wallowing in that reality.

Most of the thoughts about who we are as a person stem from something in the past, but what happens when you are no longer that person, or when that description no longer applies and you keep judging yourself by those same standards? When I look in the mirror I seem to see someone totally different from everyone else. Everyone else may see strong and outspoken but I see weak and fragile. Everyone may see amazing and beautiful, yet I see ugly scars from the past; not really letting go of my past, not really embracing this reality.

Most times in Law of Attraction we talk about that your present doesn’t reflect the things you’ve already set in motion. But what happens when you keep viewing your present with color of your past? What happens when you view every situation based on the person you were 5 years ago and not the one you are today? What happens when everyone sees the real you but you only see a bad reflection?  Now may be the time to re-assess the person you see when you look in the mirror, because that person may no longer even exist and a new and better version may be there waiting to be noticed.

Who was it that said ‘dance like no one is watching’?…

I have always loved that saying, and despite its’ simplicity, it speaks of a principle that is central to everything you want if you are after success, happiness and fulfillment. Namely, that you have to be who you are no matter what, and that means whether people are watching you or not.

There are two sides to this story, as follows:

• When everyone is watching: Sometimes we feel the need to adjust our behaviour depending on our audience, and these changes are predicated on how we feel about ourselves and the people around us in given circumstances. For example, if you feel super-confident in a certain setting, you may act in an entirely different manner than when you feel meek, insecure, and ‘not good enough’. Yet you are the same person all the time…so why act differently? Certainly there are certain tones of voice and mannerism that are appropriate for different situations, but what I am talking about is being your true self. The key to consistency is knowing yourself and really loving yourself. Invest the time to know - to decide - what you are all about, and then BE that, always. Of course who you are may change as you learn and grow, but let those changes be self-directed, rather than circumstance-directed. When you can walk down any street or into any room with a smile on your face and peace and happy anticipation in your heart, then you will know that you are truly creating your reality, rather than reacting to outside forces. The truth is, people aren’t really as interested in your life as you may think. (!) You will know from considering your daily thought patterns that most of them are about your own life and your own challenges…so why would anyone else be any different? Remembering that other people are mostly engaged in their own mental conversations with themselves is another good way to relax and enjoy yourself in any situation.

• When no one is watching: Are you capable of honoring your commitments to yourself and others whether anyone is watching you or not?…For example, if you work for a living, do you work just as hard when the boss leaves the room as you do when you think people are watching?…If your workout buddy can’t make it to the gym, will you still go?…If you are working from home, can you sit at your desk and be productive as much as you need to?…This is a sticking point for a lot of people; it’s also a real tool for breaking free into the life of your dreams if you decide to choose this way of being.

Dance, play, work, and BE YOURSELF!

For all our friends and readers in the United States, today is a day of celebration, of remembrance and gratitude and also a day off work for most.

Today is a day to appreciate living in such a wonderful country, despite any particular problems you may have to complain about. People from countries the world over want to live in America - the land of the free and the land of opportunity. There is SO much opportunity and freedom available that to someone who comes from a repressed environment America truly seems like paradise. Enjoy it with a sense of personal responsibility and there you really do have a recipe for paradise.

Have a fantastic day! Stay safe, and enjoy the celebrations in your town, knowing that people across the country are also celebrating….feel the connection.

Happy Independence Day!

I cannot remember where I first read of the concept, but I like the thought of the upward spiral when it comes to personal change.  

When people are beginning a process of change by choice, such as letting go of a habit or creating a new mindset, they sometimes feel as if they are ‘back to square one’ if or when they slip up. This can be very frustrsating and de-motivating, and it doesn’t have to be this way. In fact, it is entirely untrue.

Remember, wherever you are in your life has taken years of accumulated actions and thoughts to create. Your current set of circumstances is very complex, and it takes time to change things. This is actually a good thing, as it allows us to make adjustments as we go, and gives us the freedom to make mistakes and correct our actions.

Instead of thinking you are back to square one, try viewing yourself as being on an upward spiral. Each time you ‘come around’ to find similar feelings, you are not at the same old place…you are somewhere new, because YOU are new. You have the added thoughts, experiences and intentions of the latest version of yourself, and you are at a higher place on the path than when you began. You can see the ’same old thoughts’ from a new and slightly higher perspective, each time you come around to them. Therefore, you can see that when you come back to the same feelings or reactions, it is not a failure; it is just your old conditioning coming up, and another opportunity for you to choose.

Another way this concept can be enjoyed is by reading books more than once. I have an extensive library (although I wish it was even bigger!), and I am often going back to books I read a year or more ago. When I read them again, I find that I notice new insights, or perhaps understand passages more deeply than the first time I read them. I can enjoy a deeper impact, and thus even greater personal change, because I am continuously learning and growing, and striving to see from new perspectives. In this way, I can make the most use of my collection of information to which I am always adding.

The upward spiral is a far more encouraging and motivating way to look at personal development than thinking you are ‘back to square one’ on your path. If you have been exercising straight for 10 days and then miss a day - or even a week or two - so what? Make a new intention and jump back in. As the author of The Zone Diet say, just get back in the zone and keep going!