The Breathing Prosperity blog

If one of your main goals is wealth or financial independence, you may find yourself noticing more and more the money-related issues that surround you. Perhaps you now notice the quality of clothing people choose to wear, or their cars, or just general presentation. Perhaps as you overhear snippets of conversation each day you have begun to pick out lack-based comments vs. wealth- or abundance-mentality phrases, where before you would not have thought to make such distinctions. Have you noticed your own mentality changing and metamorphosing as you go?…If not, you have a long way to come… 

As you have read here and elsewhere many times, it is your thought processes and patterns that create your outer world, and in order to change your circumstances, you must change your thoughts. This is a noticeable occurence, as things around you will begin to be perceived differently and the meaning or significance you attach to events will change. Your values will shift and your your alignment and comfort with certain situations and people will undergo change as well.

If all this talk about change makes you uncomfortable, that is the first challenge to tackle. When you hear that you must change your thougts, it literally means you must undergo change - you cannot stay the same and expect different results. You can choose to view this as an exciting challenge or as a scary prospect. In all likelihood, the people around you will seem to change as well, as they interpret and react to the changes in you; in fact most of the time they will not have changed at all, but will be responding to the change in you, and not always in a happy way. Change threatens many people, and if you are one of those people you need to hop on over to the other side of the fence, where change is acknowledged as the only healthy and natural constant, and start rolling with it…relish every little change you notice, and be open to new views. Otherwise, how can you create your dreams? To repeat, unless YOU change, your life cannot change.

Aaron at Today is That Day points us to a great couple of posts by Steve Pavlina that follow his progression through some financial changes, and his story is well-articulated and worth reading for the lessons in it, pertaining to this subject.

Thanks to Aaron, as always, for pointing us to this fantastic content, and I hope you enjoy as many insights from Steve’s writing as I did.

For any of you who have seen The Secret, there will be a familiar line about how, if you focus on what you really love about another person rather than the things you don’t like, the Universe will set things up so that you ‘zig’ when the other person ‘zags.’ In other words, the Law of Attraction works so that you cannot be in the same space as someone is vibrating with a totally different energy level than you are, at least for long.

Today I have a question, because it seems to be plaguing me as far as what is ‘right’ in this game of understanding and applying the Law of Attraction. If you are in a relationship with someone there will be things that you wish the other person would change…if you are in it long enough! Knowing about Law of Attraction, you may decide instead to look inside and see what you are doing to create whatever the situation is, and if the actions of the other are destructive, you may choose at some point to end the relationship. My question is this: at what point do you draw the line?…What if the other person’s actions are not harmful to you, but somehow you feel you need or want something more/different and you realize it is not fair to expect anything of the other person than to be who they are…? If we are absolutely in control, then we should be able to create the perfect relationship with just about anyone…thus there should never be a reason to leave ie. if we change ourselves enough, any relationship should work out. Of course I am not discounting the desires, and level of maturity, development, etc., of the other party; this is merely a concept I keep kicking around and cannot seem to find a solid answer. I have been asked by many people who are unsure of the point at which they should give up on a current relationship, and I’m asking myself the same question. After ensuring they are not staying out of fear of being alone, how does one decide? If there is already a relationship with a lot going for it, how do you know whether to focus on enjoying the good parts (ie. make those expand in your consciousness and in reality), or to really go for having everything you want, 100%…?

Are you waiting for a special ’some day’? Perhaps one or more of the following might sound familiar:

• When you lose 10 pounds
• When you meet the right person
• When you get a raise
• When you have more time
• When you get organized
• When you are debt-free
• When you get all your ‘to-do’ list stuff done

THEN you’ll be happy, and better prepared for that wonderful future you want.

Does ’some day’ stand like a wall between your NOW and your FUTURE? Have you ever looked at it this way? To most people, some day IS the future, but is it really? Or is it just some fictional place or time in your mind when things will get done, when things will change and as if at dawn, wonderful light will suddenly be shining and your life will be fantastic (or at least better than it is now)?…

Further, is it possible that we could spend every day of our lives either living in the past or wishing things would be different in our ‘future’, and get to the last day and realize we didn’t spend enough time in the present? Although your wedding day may have been or will be very special, it is no more special than today. The memories you cherish are important, but the moments of this very day are equally precious. Every day. Every moment. Cherish each one, because - at least for this time - we only have so many rides on the merry-go-round. Smile and laugh and have fun with the people around you, just as they are right now.

Sounds like a bedtime story…and in a way, it is, because it is familiar and close to the heart for many of us. 

I am reading a Louise Hay book (called The Power is Within You) and in it she quotes someone wise who once said ‘You can choose to be happy or you can choose to be right.‘ Yikes!

We all have situations in which we feel we are so undeniably, justifiably right that we hang on to that conviction at the expense of our own peace of mind. Forgiveness is a word that is bantered around a lot in personal development circles, and I am aware that to forgive someone else is really to let go of something in my own mind, but when I read that sentence it just rang alarm bells in my head. Why, I wonder?…The thought of letting go of the anger and resentment I feel towards my ‘person’ is very difficult, especially when their behaviour affects my life and daughter’s very deeply, and I feel it is totally inappropriate and hurtful. Just listen to all that judgement! I know very well that I cannot change another person’s behaviour and should only look to my own reactions, however it is certainly a case of ‘easier said than done’. The sentence about choosing happiness really got my juices going, because maybe I somehow believe that to decide to be happy anyway means I am condoning the behaviour of this other person rather than dealing with it…hmmm….so yes, I can choose to focus on my vision of the yacht pulling up to a pier in Monaco (water gently slapping against the dock, sparkling in the sun…white boat gleaming, cool breeze, shopping and lunch…mmmm) but when I get back to reality I still feel ‘rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr’.

I also know that because there is such emotion here, there exists a huge opportunity to grow past it and enjoy new clarity and peace of mind. I do indeed value my peace of mind highly and also want to be happy, but this ‘person’ really knows how to push my buttons (code for I still have issues here - inside of myself). Rrrrrrrrrr….

Some tricks I am trying are a) acceptance of things just the way they are, b) to attempt to see the situation form the other’s point of view (with the underlying thought that we all do our best given our own set of beliefs and skills), and c) to focus on the end result that I DO want…

I feel better already. I must keep trying, as I’m sure you will agree that it’s really none of our business how other people act, and that to minimize the impact on ourselves is a valuable skill to cultivate.

Have a great day!

I just read this lovely saying in my fave magazine (Elite Traveler) and it seems to sum up the way i feel about things…it certainly made me grin from ear to ear, and I want to share it with you:

“Be daring, be different, be impractical;
be anything that will assert integrity
of purpose and imaginative vision against
the play-it-safers,the creatures of the
commonplace, the slaves of the ordinary.”

Want to be happy? Wealthy? Satisfied? The answer is as simple as they come…..be yourself. There is no one like you in the entire universe, and if you deny - or don’t even know - yourself, you deny the rest of us of the gift of seeing you shine and enjoying your unique presence. The most beautiful gift you can give to yourself and others is to be the most authentic YOU you can be. As someone wise once said, you can try all your life to be like other people, but what you should be trying to do is be more of yourself. No one can do it for you, and no one can do it LIKE you!

When we talk about the Law of Attraction, we tend to use a lot of definitions as to how things ’should’ be in order to make the best use of natural principles. For example, although we assert that nothing is either good or bad, we do say that we must keep our energy levels and thought vibrations high so that we may attract like thoughts and vibrations. Similarly, we say that we must focus on what we want, rather than what we don’t want, so that we may attract more of that which we are focused on (because what we focus on is what expands in our lives).

With all this attention on maintaining states and thought patterns that serve us and help us achieve our goals, we must also remember to allow things to flow with their natural rythms.

It is actually possible to be so rigid in our thoughts or attempts to maintain a positive state that we stop the flow of energy, thereby keeping from us that which we are trying to attract. For instance, if we are constantly monitoring our emotions so that we ‘purge’ anything negative, we may be blocking the natural flow of an emotion that needs to be processed, such as when we are naturally saddened by the death of a loved one. In a similar way, if we hold grudges against others then no matter how much work we do on ourselves in other areas, the resentment constitutes an energy block - or wall - that we have installed and which will impede the flow of all things good to the extent that it exists. These are sometimes called blind spots, and can be readily identified by noticing when you feel uptight, or when you frequently experience the same emotion or thought pattern. Your pet peeves, for example, are good clues as to your emotional blocks, and if explored and released can leave room for bursts of new growth, thus paving a new pathway for wonderful things to happen, where previously there was only a dead-end. As with everything else about Law of Attraction and personal development, the answers are inside you. Go explore!

Have you ever noticed that whenever you want to learn something new, you are faced with a million experts who want to tell you ‘THE WAY’?…

I am learning about the stock market, and have spent many hours in the past couple of months studying various books and courses, from books about trading and investing to courses covering economic and financial basics. As I go, I notice that although my comfort with financial and market concepts grows ever stronger, the information I am reading is more and more conflicting. As my knowledge grows I can see the contradictions in what people teach, moreso than I could when I had just started and was only trying to grasp terminology. In every book or course someone who says ‘If you follow my way you will make money. If you don’t then good luck while you crash and burn!’…but how can they all be true if they are completely conflicting?…

I found this all a little confusing until I remembered that in ANY industry or subject, we find the same phenomenon. Whether you are studying Law of Attraction, health and fitness, or almost any other ‘How To’ subject, there will be conflicting opinions from ‘experts.’ The fact is that there are many ways to make something ‘work’, and I think this is reflected in the many different strategies you will find to accomplish a given objective. Each person can only speak from their own expererience and perspective, and the more you learn, the more you can apply to your own life and create your own unique strategy using what works for you. Of course we need to learn from the trials and errors of others so that we can shorten our own learning curve, but we are all different in our likes and dislikes, schedules and tolerances, etc….thus, what will work best for us is usually a combination of techniques as unique as we are. In fact, I would go so far as to say that if we follow someone else’s strategy blindly, we may actually fare worse than if we experiment and try and find a combination that works best for us. Because we are unique, what worked wonders for someone else may not be best for us at all. Do not lose sight of the truth that whatever strategy you choose in any endeavour, it is the back-up traits that you bring to the game that will help you win - traits such as commitment, consistency, integrity, desire for growth and learning, and ability to visualize the end result - NOT the strategy itself. With this in mind, choose your strategy/ies, commit yourself, and change as you feel the need to make adjusmtents. As Brian Tracy says, you cannot adjust the direction of the arrow until you launch it!

Are your thought vibrations in harmony with that which you want?

One of the major principles of Law of Attraction is that everything - EVERYTHING - is vibration; that each individual existence, from human beings and rocks, to sound and light, to thoughts, exist in their true nature as frequencies…also known as vibrations. 

Like a tuning fork, a vibration of any sort will seek out and ‘pick up’ other alike vibrations. To follow this theory to its practical end and yet keep it short here, suffice to say that when we think AS IF we already are and have what it is we say we want, then we will naturally - and inevitably - attract it. By thinking about what we want rather than what we don’t want, we align oursleves - literally, vibrationally - with that which we want: The Law of Attraction in action.

Today I picked up an Abraham Hicks* book (I like to let books ‘fall open’ and see where I end up, just to discover if the message might have some particular meaning in that moment) and a phrase jumped out at me. There was a question and answer section, with common thoughts or beliefs and the answers/suggestions from Abraham Hicks as to how we might improve on them in order to align ourselves with that which we want. Most of them are old hat for me as I have been studying this subject for a long time, but one of my beliefs was on the page loud and clear and I have never realized how misaligned it is with what I truly want. The belief, and I am paraphrasing, was something like ‘There are so many wonderful places to go and see in the world and I want to be able to see all of them. I am missing out by not traveling enough and not having more wealth to enjoy the freedom I deserve and desire…I want to be elsewhere.‘ I read that basically what I am saying subconsciously is that: where I am is not good enough, I am separate from that which I want, there is something ‘wrong’ with my current situtation…just to name a few limiting and misaligned beliefs that became apparent. Wow!

Any form of longing is lack-based and prohibits the very thing you want from coming to you. I can improve my mindset and my ability to create what I want by better aligning myself vibrationally, ie. via my thoughts. I can think such productive thoughts as: I travel often and I LOVE seeing all the exotic and beautiful places of the world. I love that there are so many places to see and do, and I am so lucky that I will have the opportunity to explore and see all of the places on my list. Today’s technology is so fantastic and I can book online and go last-minute to almost anywhere. How exciting! I’m so grateful to be living the life of my dreams.

Now, the fact is I already DO travel quite a lot and I’m already living the (evolving) life of my dreams, but in this particular case I was NOT correctly aligned. I was pining for the places I have not yet had the chance to see, and for even more freedom and money so that I can ‘get started’…what an eye-opener that was. I am sharing this in hopes that you, too, may discover some ways in which you have been limiting yourself without even realizing it…because then you can CHANGE your mind, and thus change your life!

(*You may remember Esther Hicks from her interview on The Secret…now availabe in book form!)

As usual, it is in practice rather than in theory that we find out if our beliefs and choices serve us.

I have been so deeply sad in the past couple of days about Jordan (about whom I wrote yesterday) that I haven’t really cared about much except perhaps being grateful for my own little girl. I know very well that this stagnant state of mind is neither healthy nor helpful, but I also know from my bereavement training that people need to have a little space and time to assimilate something - myself included.

However, as we know many people die in many tragic ways all over the world every day. One of the very fundamental principles of what we teach - as you will hear everywhere from our courses to The Secret - is that you create and experience what you think about. Thus, sadness begets sadness. We can ALWAYS find something to be sad or upset about, even if it isn’t an immediate tragic event.

So, this morning as I was driving along and trying to shake myself out of it, it occurred to me that maybe we feel guilty being happy when we know things aren’t ‘right’. It all comes down to the same thing in a way…do you not have wealth because inside you are concerned that people won’t like you? Do you hold your tongue when you are angry out of respect, or is it because you are afraid of the repercussions of speaking your mind? Do you feel wrong being happy when someone you know is sick, or hurting? The underlying belief in all of this is really important because it keeps us from creating and experiencing the lives of our dreams…it says that what others think is more important than our own happiness. That we must curtail ourselves, hold ourselves back and act in certain ‘acceptable ‘ways. How can we just go around being HAPPY???

Well…if you say you want happiness, then how can you achieve it if you don’t choose it?…not just when it is easy and everything is going swimmingly, but always…because it is your choice, and it is your life.

Of course there is a time for sadness and for anger, but if we hang on to it it hurts only us, both as we hang on to it and by the results we create with it…you are what you think about. I can grieve with my friends and be happy in my own life all at the same time. I must keep my perspective balanced and hold all of it - happy and sad - in my mind at one time. 

I have already decided (=intent) that when faced with adversity, I will choose to bounce back and carry on with my life, being focused on my goals (=flexibility), so now I need only to rely on that prior decision to help me regain my perspective. This is what we mean when we say decide what you want to be, and then BE THAT. I choose peace, and from that place I can best help myself and my friends.

This weekend, dear friends of ours lost their little girl, Jordan. Of all things, she choked on a grape, and died in her father’s arms despite their frantic efforts to save her. She was only 3 years old, and I write this as just a small tribute to the sweet young girl that she was. Jordan was a delightful child, and touched the lives of everyone who knew her. Her parents are exceptional people and created a little girl with a unique mix of her father’s quiet intelligence and her mother’s fiery, brilliant feistiness. It is so very difficult to watch them suffer through this loss. In fact, it causes me to question my deepest beliefs…for how can Law of Attraction apply here? How can they have thought this into happening?…They are expecting another baby and are probably the best and most loving parents I have known. The truth is we cannot know everything and there are forces at play that we just do not understand…all I can do is be there for my friends in the days and months to come. I apologize for the sadness of today’s post, but felt it necessary to say goodbye and thank you to little Jordan for being with us these past short years…we love you and we will deeply miss your little ways.