The Breathing Prosperity blog

A wise man once said, ‘Circumstances do not make the man; they merely reveal him to himself.’ Isn’t that a great saying? Actually it’s a little shorter than that, and it’s from the fantastic book ‘As a Man Thinketh’ by James Allen. (This is a classic part of any personal development library and can be found in many places. One we particularly like is >>this one<< because for about the same price you get a compilation that includes four other books by James Allen as well.)

It is easy to be happy and optimistic when things are going well...we can all do that.  But how do you behave when things begin to fall apart? Circumstances cannot always be ideal (although in the larger sense they are), and it is when nothing seems to go 'our way' that we see what we we are made of. This is the time when we can recognize clearly what skills we may still need to cultivate...oh let's say, patience, trusting in the outcome, calmness and confidence, and flexibility, just to name a few that come to mind. If you can exhibit grace under fire rather than falling apart, it is a sure sign that you are developing deep and lasting control of yourself and that you are a fairly happy person.

One way to master this is to make decisions in advance. It's a simple technique, and very effective. As success coach Brian Tracy tells us, resolve ahead of time that you will bounce back when hit by unexpected blows. When the proverbial storm hits, learn to bend like a willow instead of breaking like an oak.

By making the decision ahead of time that you:

• Always have choices no matter what happens,
• Always look for the lesson or learning curve in adverse circumstances, so you will have better coping skills next time,
• Will be flexible and open when things don’t go the way you want them to,
• Never give up on what you want,
• Always bounce back no matter what the setback…you always get up and keep going
• Will try to make your recovery times better and better each time something upsets you,

etc….you will be ahead of the game and will feel far more confident in yourself when things are difficult. Although it is not understandable that people get upset when something is frustrating or disappointing, the truth is it’s not necessary. There are other, more effective ways to handle our emotions, and the quicker we can release the upset the quicker we can re-open our minds to allow solutions or resolutions to present themselves.

As usual, just food for thought…

There once was a woman who had a $30 check and related to me that she was embarassed to take it to the bank. She literally went to the bank, went in, and felt so humiliated by having this ’small deposit’ that she had to walk out and pull herself together. This little act brought out deep feelings of shame and disgust, low self-esteem and the suspicion that everyone in the bank - the people lined up as well as the tellers - would just know she was poor, and would be judging and ridiculing her for her lack of money.

This story is sad to me, and illustrates poignantly how much our emotions can get embroiled with the subject of money, and how deeply our self esteem can be affected, if we let it.

Here’s another story: I know of a man who attended a financial seminar. There, he was told that if he began ‘paying himself first’ by keeping 10% of his salary before he allocated the rest of it to monthly expenses, he would eventually find himself wealthy. We have all heard this advice, and what we know is that very few follow it. Like many, this man thought to himself that although this advice sounded good, it was not practical, as there was NO WAY he could save 10% of his income. He had no luxury expenses to shave off his budget, and was barely getting by. So…instead of giving up and saying ‘well, just forget it then’, he made a pact with himself. He got an old mason jar and put it on his dresser. Every day when he came home, he put whatever change was in his pocket in the jar, and as the days went by, he watched the money grow. To his delight, this was fun, and he found himself more conscious during the day about how he spent his change, as the quarters and dimes somehow didn’t seem ‘insignificant’ anymore. At the end of the month, the man took the change jar to his bank with the intention of opening an account where he could regularly deposit money and watch it grow. To his surprise, the bank would not accept loose change; he either had to roll it, or find a way to turn it into paper money before they would accept it. This could have been embarassing, but what we have here is a mindset; this man had seen a *glimmer* of what it’s like to keep your money and watch it grow, rather than spend it. (We all want more money, but most of us want to spend it!*)

This gentleman actually found a little machine in a local grocery store where he could pour in his change and it would count it, and give him a receipt. The cashier would then reimburse him the money and voila!…he took it to the bank. Each month, he would ‘cash in’ his change, and take it to the bank to deposit it. In the bank line-up, he would be almost giddy with excitement as he thought about his growing money, and the future wealth he was creating.

These stories illustrate the vast differences possible in reactions to the same situation. Notice that it’s all in our minds…none of what was going on in either case was external. It had nothing to do with the bank, the tellers and customers, or the $30. In the second case, the thought did not even occur to the gentleman to be embarassed that he was ‘only’ depositing $30. He looked upon it as a small piece that he was adding to his future fortune - his thought about the money was different.

We have all heard the principle that we have to change what’s going on inside - our thoughts and emotions - before our outside lives can change. In these two scenarios you can clearly see the path along which each person will travel, based on their predominant thought patterns. Unless they change, their trajectories won’t change…in some cases this is beneficial, and in some it is detrimental. It all depends on the thoughts! Choose yours carefully, based on what you want (not what you don’t want). Simple advice - follow it and reap the rewards!

*P.S. The path to wealth is to have your money make more money, and you cannot do that if you spend it. Most people want to be wealthy, but as soon as they get some money, the spend it! This is the opposite of wealth…wealth means accumulating money…not getting rid of it.

Yesterday I recieved an email in my mailbox about a domain I owned - someone wanted to buy it from me (even though the purpose of this domain was to be re-sold; that was the reason I originally bought it). Anyway this person wanted to know how much I wanted for the domain. Instead of giving a price, not wanting to say too little I replied asking the person to tell me how much they would be willing to pay. A few hours passed and I got an email asking If I would accept $25K for this domain and if the domain is appraised for higher if I’d give a 10-15% discount (off the higher appraised price).

Now a $25K offer for a domain that I paid $7.00 for was far from what I thought the domain was worth - yes I knew the domain was rare, but never thought $25K rare! Now I know we preach the whole ‘If the Universe sends you stuff you should say YIPPEE thank you Universe’ but I found myself laughing at the offer. My exact words were ‘either I have a gem and don’t know it or this guy is stupid.’ Was it not me affirming that I had a surplus of money? Then Law of Attraction says hey you have a surplus let me give you more surplus and what do I do? I laugh - calling the guy stupid - then to add insult to injury, the guy asks for me to get the domain appraised which costs $69 and I decide not going to spend $69 to get this appraised. I don’t think it’s worth more than 250 bucks for this domain.  I was happy with the thought it was only worth 250 that I couldn’t accept that maybe it was worth $25K. It’s a huge gap from 250 bucks to $25K - more like the grand canyon gap - but you know what? If I sold it to him for 250 bucks and he turned around and sold it for $25K I’d be mad that I suckered myself out of 24,750 bucks.

Do we set limits on the amount of money we earn, and recieve? Using my example I realize that we do stand in the way of our financial abundance; we put limits based on what we think we can or will accept, based on how much we think it is worth. I was reading steve Aitchison’s 5 Ways to Conquer Your Fear of Financial Success where he talks about putting a mental block on his adsense earnings, he also talks about the fact that people don’t expect to make money, they don’t see how, they just think I don’t know how to make money, I don’t know where it’s going to come from, I don’t have any.

I did a post a few months ago called Do You Ask For Things and Then Tell the Universe No Thanks?! I know I keep bringing him up but it is a valid point - the cabbie couldn’t accept the fact that 31 diamonds were left in his car; it was way more than he had thought or hoped for, just like $25K was way more than I had thought or hoped for with this domain. So then this brings up the question - has the Universe already tried to answer you requests for money? Has the Universe already tried to send the millions that you’ve asked for? The fact that you don’t see that money sitting in your bank account doesn’t mean the Universe never tried and you stopped the transaction with some thought of the fact that it was just way too much for you to accept. 

Most limits on money are mental limits. Are you standing in the way of your financial abundance?

The problem for most people including myself is not starting a goal but leaving it unfinished. Unfinished goals have become like plus signs (+) in our failure columns. Lose weight +, make more money +…

Why do we always tend to leave our goals unfinished and how do we resolve that? The goal may be for diet, exercise, financial improvement or otherwise, but somewhere along the line we just leave a whole pile of goals, dreams, aspirations and projects unfinished.

Why do we leave things unfinished?…

Usually the same energy and excitement that is used to start a goal seems to taper off somewhere around the middle leaving  - well, BOREDOM. Do I have to finish this? For most it maybe that something pushed them off track of a well meaning goal. They decide to lose weight - they work out at a specific time of day - they are good at keeping it on track for 1 week and then for one day life happens; work late, pick up the kids, overslept and now they feel horrible. Oh great I missed a day out of my workout, I failed because I didn’t work out every single day like my plan said. Now they start feeling shame of not being able to commit to anything for a period of time, then the next day they wake up and think ’Well I’ve already failed with my plans for going to work out so since I didn’t go yesterday, then today shouldn’t matter that much.’ Now they’ve missed 2 days in a row -more guilt, more blaming, more thoughts of failure…by day 3, it’s pretty much a dead case. ’Yeah I was working out but I couldn’t go for a few days - I guess my daily workout plan didn’t quite work out daily.’

With any goal that is how it’s left unfinished or any project - something happens that shifts your focus and before you know it, you really don’t want to go back to your old project. Sometimes you just think it’s a complete waste of time or don’t want the feeling that you have failed at your goals so why even bother trying?…

How to make sure you finish your goals:

A surefire way to make sure you complete your goals is to just simply pick them up again when your mind runs on the task or the goal. Example, if you think about going to the gym and you haven’t gone in 3 weeks, just get dressed and go to the gym! Just re-start the goal or continue with the goal. If you have a project that’s 25% complete and you think about it, just go ahead and do another 10%. If you went to the gym off and on for a period of a year, wouldn’t you have a better body than going and stopping for 4 years? If you keep completing portions of a project whenever you think about it, won’t it be a 100% complete eventually? The trick is to do a little bit more towards your goal every time you remember it or every time you hear yourself say that you’ve failed. If you keep picking up breadcrumbs you will eventually get to the goal - either that or at least have a load of breadcrumbs!

Wow! Recently, after being inspired by the habits of a personal development associate, Mr. Gleb Reys of Personal Development.ie, I made a decision to wake up every morning at 6am and get even more done with my days.

I normally wake up between 6:30 and 8:00am anyway, depending on the day, and this decision was made to further my self-discipline. What has happened in just the few days I have been doing it, though, is quite a nice surprise:

• I now naturally wake up at 6am on the dot - what an amazing alarm clock the body is! What a treat not to have to be jolted by an alarm.
• I have gone for a walk every morning while the sun is just coming up…and even taken a few chances to meditate on a park bench in pure silence as the day begins to warm.
• The few people I’ve seen I have felt a kindredship with that I don’t normally feel every day when I pass people on my walks (later in the day).
• I’ve seen birds and animals playing in yards and parks that I would normally never see…the early bird really does get the worm.
• I have experienced clarity about my day and life to come as I walk, and feel amazingly refreshed and clear upon arriving back home.
• I am able to accomplish much of my daily ‘absolutely must do’ list before 8am. Within these two early morning hours, I read the financial paper as well as a chapter of my chosen book - right now I am learning even more about investing - and in this way I ensure I continue my education consistently before I even begin my workday.
• Because I work from home there is a possibility of mixing up my hours…but in these last few days I have sat down to my computer at 8am sharp. Because I didn’t have anything nagging at me (I still have to exercise, etc.), I worked straight through for 6 or 8 hours and still had many hours ahead of me before bed.

It’s really surprising to me the sense of accomplishment and time management this little discipline is rewarding me with, and I just thought I would share. I think it was the decision to make the most of the time rather than to get up at 6am that has made the biggest difference…as it really isn’t that much earlier than my normal morning would begin. Amazing!

Estimates are that only 10% of the population has goals, and of those people only 3% have them written down, thus standing a FAR greater chance of achieving them. These statistics are really unfortunate, because it means that most people won’t accomplish much and…well, look around…isn’t that true? 

Our aim here at Breathing Prosperity is to help increase these numbers by spreading the word and educating people as to how to truly go about creating the lives they Read more…

Are you waffling about something? Wishy-washy? Do you have a hard time making decisions in general?…

Many people feel confused, uncertain or unhappy about their circumstances, both current as well as future. This can be due to two major issues, which tend to piggy-back on each other, namely:

• Lack of Clarity: To truly feel in control of our lives, we need to have clarity about who we are and what we want. This allows us to spend our time on activities that matter to us, and lead us towards what we want. Then, when the inevitable ‘unexpected’ happens, we will feel flexible and strong, instead of worried and scared. Spend some time figuring out what you want out of life…we offer you many resources, such as our courses, recommendations and the articles at Daily Motivation, and there are plenty more out there. Make a DECISION to clarify and define what you want, and your life will begin to transform before your very eyes.
• Lack of Confidence: When we cannot see that what we wish for is possible, we don’t feel confident in ourselves, our abilities, or the possibility of our dreams coming true. How sad! By following the above advice about clarity, you will begin to gain confidence. Just by looking ahead and up instead of spending wach day mired in ‘everyday stuff’ you will feel gain momentum, insight and strength. Make a DECISION to expand your mind, your resources, and your potential. Take our courses or others that offer insider advice on how to change your mind, and then go do it!

The moment you make a DECISION to change, is when everything begins to change. Some quotes for today:

“A wise man makes his own decision, an ignorant man follows public opinion” ~ Chinese Proverb

“The most difficult thing is the decison to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.” ~ Amelia Erhardt

“Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way” ~ W.H. Murray (often incorrectly attributed to Goethe)

“Everything is something you decide to do, and there is nothing you have to do.” ~ Denis Waitley

For the last few days I have been getting numerous calls from people who feel they are in a horrible situation and want me to tell them something positive - anything to make them feel a little better about their situation. For the most part I would say It will work, You can make it work, It’s not the end of the world - Let’s find a solution here, but today it occured to me that the only reason people were calling me was because they thought I had something they didn’t have, some level of something - whether it be faith or positivity - but something they thought they were lacking. But guess what?

There is nothing that anyone else has that you don’t. If someone is positive you can be too. If someone can find solutions you can do it too. If someone can create wealth, you can do it too. If someone can overcome all odds you can do it too…No one is better, greater than you are - you are a creator so how about you start shining and stop waiting for someone else to shine into your life. So today’s affirmation is I AM A CREATOR WATCH ME SHINE!

Life is like a box of chocolates - you never know what you are gonna get. I actually think life is like gardening - you know exactly what you are going to get.

I recently had my 30th birthday. I hate telling people that - they go man you are so young…Okkkk..But on that day that I turned 30 - April 27th by the way - I had an important revelation that keeps coming back to me: life is like gardening. If you knew me very well you would know I have a red thumb, or purple thumb - whatever is the polar opposite of green. Don’t ever give me a plant for fear it will not live to tell the tale.

My next door neighbor thought my house would look so much better with a garden, so went out and bought beautiful roses and planted them in my yard. I told her don’t expect for me to Read more…

For much of my life, I hated concepts like winning and winner, competition and trying to beat the other guy. I felt this type of thinking denigrated everyone else and left most people feeling like ‘losers’ in life, while instead we should be appreciating everyone’s unique gifts and talents.

While I still believe it appreciating each person uniquely, I have come to see that this does not preclude winning. Winning means striving for more, never giving up, asking your Read more…